For anyone who has followed my blog, deciding on a title for this blog was most challenging. You see, I haven't written a blog post since the end of my student teaching - If I would have they might have been titled, "Recovering from the Past", "Still Dealing with the Scars", or "Dealing with Blog and Technology Phobia". You may ask, why? The most simple and most basic way I can put it is that I was burnt on school and the overload of expectations - mentally and physically I was exhausted. It was literally so bad that I could hardly stand to look at a computer - let alone type something or check my email. Anything related to my student teaching for several months made me feel instantly stressed and under pressure even though it was over.
Over the summer of 2016, God brought a very special young man back into my life. We went to high school together, but didn't keep in contact too much after I went to college. He was just what I needed. Someone to listen to me as I unburdened the load of mental anguish, stress, and school-related fears that I carried that last year of college and during my student teaching. Life was like a tunnel with seemingly no end as I had to repeatedly stand for my beliefs, work multiple jobs to try to make ends meet while carrying 25 credits, and then I would go home - only to find that things on our small farm were trying to fall apart, and my dreams seemed to be crashing around me.
If it wouldn't have been for the Lord's help, I would have never made it. God was there with me throughout it all! I know my parents and grandparents were praying too. Many times my mom would tell me, "Just hang on, and keep looking for the light at the end of the tunnel", or "Remember the 3 Hebrew children? - Don't Bend, Bow, or Burn" or "God has a plan. Just keep trusting Him." I'm so thankful for the God's guiding hand, the wisdom of my mother, and a true friend when everything else looked dismal and nearly hopeless!
I'm thankful to report that I did recover. Yes, there are still some unpleasant memories, but I can now focus on the positive things, the unique opportunities, and the knowledge and wisdom I gained from the experience. Now in my second year of teaching I can honestly say that I love teaching. (Most days 😜)
